I miss when my kids were this age. So sweet and innocent and full of wonder. I love them to pieces but these teenage years are challenging. This break has been good. It’s given me and Jon time to reconnect. Also, I realize I do way too much for them. That’s the people pleaser in me. Something to work on.
Well after yesterday’s mini meltdown I realized a lot of my struggle comes from the conflict I feel about being a dieting feminist. I know fasting is supposed to be a “lifestyle” and not a diet but let’s face it, it’s got the same goal. To lose weight. We try to say that it’s to feel healthier but 90% of it is about appearance. If we’re honest. I struggle with that because I don’t like that women have to try to fit in this tiny and very specific standard of beauty. But I feel better fasting & I actually feel more sane around food. And yup, I wouldn’t mind looking fantastic in a pair of size 6 jeans. Focusing on this stuff is just who I am and that’s okay.
Today was good. I had a lunch date so I did a 17/7 with no snacking between meals. I also took a break from sweets today and that felt great after having overdone it for the last few weeks here. I think I’m going to be okay. I just need a plan I can feel good about and I need to just kind of relax into it without worrying about the scale too much.
Weight: 157 lbs (could be worse..)
1/2 salad with salmon, cup veggie soup, sf chai
Pickles, pickled mushrooms, glass wine
Pot roast, roasted veggies
Plain yogurt, fruit, nuts